Posted by: tootingtrumpet | July 2, 2009

The Strauss Tapes Part XVIII

england-lions-26550As an England XI face Warwickshire in a practice match, an Australian XI faces the preposterously titled “England Lions” in a simultaneous practice match. The following tape of a conversation between the two English captains has fallen into the grateful hands of The Tooting Trumpet.


“Hello, can I speak to Ian Bell please? Oh that is you Ian – sorry, I thought it was the Bell Boy. Well Flintoff thought it was hilarious, but he laughs at his own jokes and nobody else does. What’s that noise? Okay, so it’s Harmy on the mobile to Flintoff laughing.

We’re having a fine time at Edgbaston. In the heat, I decided to give it up after an hour to stay fit and focussed on Cardiff as did most of the lads actually, except Cookie who was the only one of us who knew that the runs would count against our averages, so he hung around to make a hundred and something. He was shattered when he came in, but by all accounts he played well – I’m not sure myself, as I was in the air-conditioned players’ lounge watching Wimbeldon for most of his knock.

Murray? Straight sets – and he looked bloody good. Sorry Belly, it was Colly you were asking about. Not sure really – 20-odd I suppose. Doesn’t matter really does it?

Anyway, how did your lads get on? I heard that your boys were running right through them. What’s that? Hussey and Mitch? That many? Hot too I suppose? And how did Saj do? Oh. And Adil? Oh.

Okay – better go. Good luck tomorrow – you might need it with Mitch on top of his game.”



  1. Not long now Toots.

    Can’t wait for next Wednesday night 7pm (my time of course)

  2. Lev – Good to hear from you sir!

    My estimate is that 21 of the 22 players who walk out at Cardiff have a question mark over them of one kind or another. Probably only Michael Clarke has nothing to prove. Makes it something really to look forward to!

  3. Dunno about Clarke, he has as many question marks as anyone I reckon. He may soon erase my doubts but if not I hope the young Croweater Ferguson is on standby.

    As for the series I’ll tip it at 2-1 Australia’s way.

    (At a pinch I will settle for 2-2 and retention of the little brown jug;)

  4. Perfect!

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