Posted by: tootingtrumpet | December 26, 2010

The Strauss Tapes – Part XXXV

Ask not for whom the bell tolls...


Swanny – take the beard and red coat off now. This is serious stuff now, you know, your proper job. You don’t want Hussey to sleigh you again do you? See, we can all do it Swanny.  All right Belly – it wasn’t that funny.

Okay lads, we all knew it was too good to be true and that we were due to cop one from these bastards. Okay, all of us but Finny knew it, and even he’s learned now. Oh stop yawning Finny – you do want to play don’t you? Yes – I know Eoin, I know.

Now we don’t want to be too down about Perth – after all plenty went well. We got off to a great start. Not you Tremmers, me – I won the toss. But then we let them get away from us in the late order and we didn’t bat well. Obviously there was some good bowling by Mitch and co – I know I got two unplayable balls – but some of us gave it away a bit easily didn’t we KP? And it didn’t look good on the fifth morning either – jeez, half of you looked like you had pull-along suitcases rather than bats with you. Fourth morning was it Eoin? Really?

Anyway, like Nathan Hauritz, what’s gone is gone, so we need to concentrate on the next match. There’ll be a big crowd in – half of Melbourne will be there. Really – I think literally half of Melbourne will be there, so we need to stand up and be counted. Not you Bres, sorry. They’re still the same lot we hammered at Adelaide. Okay – except for Katich. And North. And Doherty. And Bollinger.

You know that wasn’t helpful.



  1. It feels like everything has changed and nothing has changed since Adelaide.
    Having zero expectations on this Australian team worked well last time out, so will stick to that, especially if it becomes a pudding pitch.

  2. Jim, aus will ace this. No worries. So far a repeat of Perth. Good move to retain the 4 best bowlers than go for a token spinner just because not taking a spinner misfired last Ashes. That was 2009. This is 2010, almost 2011. That was in Old blighty. This is down under. Good move by Ricky and co(i see greg chappel’s hand in thinking out of the box here)

    Anyway, a top order batsman fighting among ruins with the lower order and #6 for company.only difference is #6 will fire this time. Déjà vu? Heck, it was just a week back we saw that. History repeats itself, i know, but that was some quick service by history. 2-1 for ricky’s side in the new year at sydney, then? Cheerio. Merry Christmas, indeed!

  3. Cant believe it!

    Ok, maybe the scenario’s being setup for a Ricky miracle. Bundle out England for less than 98 or say, even 250. A Ricky double century, which is surely due now, later, England chase 150+ on this pitch. And a repeat of Perth 2nd inns. Easy, innit?
    I certainly believe it is darkest before dawn for Ricky, who will surely not go out with a whimper.

  4. Well, there IS a silver lining. Spinners seem to be of zero uae and aus have 4+1 quicks plus smith to cover for any spin req. If eng can bowl out aus with 3 quicks, aus will win this match with 5 quicks.

  5. Come on Johnson! Show ’em who has the better quicks

  6. Kaminey – the only thing guaranteed in Australia’s second innings is a face saving 50 odd for Michael Clarke. Would love a ponting double hundred, but cannot see it happening again in this life time, let alone this match. Right now just hoping a few of the team turn up tomorrow and at least have a crack.

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