Phillip Hughes

Did a fantastic job protecting Ponting prior to lunch and then lost the battle with Flintoff after the break. The jingoistic English press are now informing all and sundry that Flintoff is back to his bollocking best but that is just their usual wishful hyperbole. Hughes copped a fearful examination from Dale Steyn and Morne Morkel in Johannesburg yet scored twin centuries in the next encounter. Beating up a 20 year old kid is hardly triumphant especially when you consider the score at day’s end.

England’s Bowling

If England are relying on atmospheric conditions, the turning of the tide and potholes in the pitch to dismiss Australia cheaply and regularly they will be beaten as soundly as they were last series. Consistency, versatility and aggression win Test matches and they weren’t on display for any length of time on Day Two.

Ricky Ponting

In Australia we all grow up listening to stories of our ancestors who were possessed by the mythical ANZAC spirit. These heroic men and women under severe adversity dug deep into their core and produced their best when it was needed most. Ricky has that spirit in spades and yesterday he inspirationally showed his young team of Ashes rookies how to bat in England.

The Venue

The first Test of an Ashes series deserves a grander venue than the provincial Sofia Gardens. At times, probably because of the lack of grandstands, it appears to have the subdued atmosphere of an ordinary domestic match.

Simon Katich

After being made the scapegoat at the conclusion of the last series in England, the New South Wales skipper set about reinventing and reinvigorating his game and yesterday was the culmination of all the sacrifice and honest introspection. Katich is an important foundation as Australia move forward in this new era and vital, both on and off the field, to its success. Mentally, he is cut from a similar mould to Steve Waugh and England will need to get him in the first hour as he has a thirst for grinding out huge scores when in touch.

Graeme Swann

The feisty tweaker played a superb innings in the first session belting Australia’s bowlers to all parts. He could have scored plenty more and continued Australia’s agony but was let down by an unnecessary and incredibly stupid shot by James Anderson. Although I like his cheekiness I fear the wink at Johnson after hitting him for four may see him attending casualty before the series is through. I can only assume he didn’t watch the carnage Mitch produced in Africa!

Billy Doctrove

I understand that the people from the Caribbean are usually laid-back but this umpire has taken ambivalence to a whole new level!

Andrew Flintoff

Apart from a couple of overs bullying Hughes he was pretty ordinary. He’ll need to perform more consistently over longer periods if England are to gain ascendancy over five Test matches.

Monty Panesar

If Australia are able to gain a lead and are pushing for runs Mitchell Johnson could end Monty’s international career today. His line was loose, his length uncertain and he never bowled anything but the same delivery over after over. To put his performance in perspective all you need to know is that Nathan Hauritz is a more accomplished bowler.

The Psychological Battle

After being smashed five-nil in the last series the English players wouldn’t be human if doubt and shadow weren’t their constant companions as they drifted uneasily off to sleep last night. Australia’s senior players, Ponting and Katich, reminded them that no matter the circumstances Australia will never, ever give anything but their whole.

Day Three

England must dismiss Australia before stumps. If they do not I think we’ll be hearing Cardiff and Adelaide in the same sentence quite a lot in future Ashes discussion.

[Image: Getty]

The Team Sheets

I suspect that there was relief in the English dressing sheds when Strauss returned with the Australian team sheet. Retaining Australia’s pace attack from South Africa was a no-brainer but choosing Hauritz instead of Clark would have brought a grin to many a face.

The Toss

When you select two spinners it is imperative that you win the toss and bat first. Strauss did exactly that and Australia will be under pressure for the rest of the Test as a consequence.

The Pitch

Fortunately for Australia the atmospheric conditions were conducive to swing otherwise the scorecard would have looked very ugly at day’s end. There was little lateral movement and the bounce is slow and predictable. For the patient batsman there are few demons and plenty of runs and Australia will be looking for Simon Katich to dig in and score an ugly, monotonous century on Day Two to haul them to a respectable position.

Ben Hilfenhaus

On the biggest stage showed the cricketing world why he is rated so highly at home. In only his fourth Test with very few competitive overs under his belt he troubled every batsman with several spells of polished and lively outswing. He was Australia’s best bowler by some distance and was the only one to continually trouble Kevin Pietersen.

Nathan Hauritz

His inclusion was forced on Ponting by the pitch conditions and he didn’t impress. A team is only as strong as its weakest member and Hauritz is clearly out of his depth. His bowling before the second new ball was insipid and allowed Flintoff and Prior to wrestle the initiative away from Australia after Hilfenhaus broke the Collingwood/Pietersen partnership.

Mitchell Johnson

Apart from a couple of explosive overs before lunch Mitch looked out of sorts. The uneven and shifting surface in delivery stride bothered him and he never really found rhythm. On the sunny side, he will probably not bowl any worse all tour.

Peter Siddle

The aggressive Victorian rescued Australia from a fast approaching abyss late in the day when he removed Flintoff and then produced an almost unplayable quick and late inswinger to send Prior on his way. Another who will improve with more competitive overs behind him.

Kevin Pietersen

England’s most damaging batsman had his foot on Australia’s throat before foolishly gifting his wicket to the least challenging of Australia’s bowlers. Curiously, after tea he became distracted and couldn’t keep concentration. Perhaps he was bothered by his tender achilles or the benign pitch but whatever it was his wicket a few overs after Collingwood’s dismissal allowed Australia back in the match.

Matt Prior

The ‘keeper played an excellent counter attacking innings late in the day that should see England post a respectable, and if things go well in the morning session, match-winning first innings total. He was helped by Hauritz’ wayward bowling but nonetheless he turned a precarious situation into a positive for his team.

Nightwatchman

In three decades of watching and playing cricket it was the first time I’ve ever seen a nightwatchman to protect a No. 8. It was a maniacally defensive tactic and probably was a factor in Prior losing his wicket as Australia were encouraged by the decision. It was curious indeed for Swann will now be entering late in the innings with only Monty Panesar as insurance.

Day Two

England are in a sound position yet Australia will be very pleased with their initial efforts. Obviously, England will be looking at batting as long as they are able but you can be assured that Australia will lift their intensity and throw everything at them in the first hour. If the ball doesn’t swing like it did on Day One England will be chasing leather for much of the afternoon as there will be little else for the bowlers except some slow turn. It will be interesting, hard fought and nailbiting and you wouldn’t expect anything else.

The 2009 Ashes contest begins shortly at the home of Welsh cricket, Sophia Gardens in Cardiff. Obviously, there is a lot at stake in the series not least Australia’s tentative place at the peak of the Test cricket world.

Australia will undoubtedly bat first if they win the toss and England will have to bowl very well to keep them under 350 regularly as the batting is strong and deep with Mitchell Johnson, a centurion in his last Test, coming in at eight.

The Australian bowling is less secure and much has been made of their inexperience although it should be remembered that this supposed flaw proved critical against South Africa as their youthful enthusiasm and unfamiliar nature became an accidental advantage.

England are so frightfully inconsistent that it’s difficult to judge their prospects. However, one thing is certain, they’ll need to improve on their performances against the Windies significantly if they are to challenge their old foes over five Test matches.

After the five-nil drubbing last series and their most recent win in South Africa, Australia deserve favouritism but as Graeme Smith and co. discovered in February what the bookies reckon means very little once the batsman take guard and the opening bowlers mark out their run-ups.

Australia may have a few problems but they’ve spent most of the last year playing India and South Africa and that should stand them in good stead against easier opposition. Let’s hope England play somewhere near their potential and in doing so produce a competitive series.

Seldom are prayers answered, especially when you are a natural sceptic suspicious of sky god superstitions yet Brett Lee’s timely injury has me considering spending the afternoon in the shed constructing a tiny straw and cloth facsimile of Nathan Hauritz to poke and prod with sharp instruments in the full moonlight at the stroke of midnight.

Hopefully, if the spell is cast in the correct fashion the ever conservative and mostly confused Andrew Hilditch will have no choice but to select a balanced pace attack of Johnson, Siddle, Hilfenhaus and Clark for the First Test beginning tomorrow.

No time to dally so I’m off to mow a pentacle on the back lawn, hunt down an amaurotic and no doubt neurotic newt while still finding time to bribe the weird little bloke with the combover and black dress at the local cathedral.

Wish me luck!

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“Right gentlemen, take a seat. Belly – go and get Swanny will you? If he’s phone-flirting with Gabby Logan again, tell them him to hurry up and get in here.

You’ve heard the news about the quickie then? Not Harmy, Binga. Fred’s been on the phone commiserating like it’s Edgbaston all over again. What did he say Fred? It’s just that Mark Nicholas has been on to me, as he’s worried now Binga may be on the market – name recognition in Kolkata or something seemed to be bothering him.

To business. First let’s look at the bowling plans.

Hughes – Dead straight and bounce him;

Katich – No width and short;

Punter – Bumpers at the body.

It goes on like this, but I think you get the picture.

Now to the batters:

I’m going to defend early then look to put the bad ball away;

Cookie – See off the new ball, then look to accelerate;

Ravi – Don’t give it away early, then look to up your strike rate.

It goes on like this, but I think you get the picture.

Right, everyone know what time nets are tomorrow? Don’t be late, especially you Belly, as you’re in my net loading the bowling machine.”

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In 2006-7, the only real question was, “Do the old men of Australia have another series in them?” The Trumpet can’t recall the detail, but he understands that the answer was “Yes.”

Two and a half years later, there are many more questions as the new look Australian squad take on a new look (or, at least, newish look) England squad at the new venue – Cardiff. The answers will emerge over a concentrated period of just seven weeks, which is like serving a banquet at Burger King.

Now the squad has been named, The Trumpet stares into his crystal ball and essays a few answers below.

Openers (Strauss and Cook) – With 19 stands of fifty or more between them, and with both showing a bit of form after personal slumps, England will expect at least one stand that sees off the new ball. With Flintoff’s batting fragile, England need the openers to deliver.

Middle order (Ravi, KP, Colly, Bell) – Ravi is in the form of his life and, with confidence at the other end of the scale from the man he displaced, Ian Bell (in the squad in case a batsman treads on a ball in the warm-up), he will walk to the crease like he owns the stage. KP and Colly both like the big match atmosphere, one all unorthodox class, the other all ugly accumulation. England will look to these three men to be at the crease while over four hundred runs are scored in the match. A tall order.

Late middle order (Prior, Flintoff, Swanny, Broad) – Despite all the coaching and the junior tours and matches, Prior is batsman who happens to field behind the stumps. He needs to play as a proper batsman and, after an overly-aggressive, falsely confident first spell as an England player, a little humility has seen him improve. Batting a notch above his opposite number, he’ll need to. Flintoff at 7 will be briefed to play with freedom the way 7s do in the post-Gilchrist world. When he has tried to play like a proper batsman in recent years, he has failed, so all England fans will hope that he banishes his oft-stated belief that he is a batsman who bowls and becomes a bowler who bats with freedom to play. Swanny and Broad will look to hit boundaries and get to thirty quickly before setting out their stalls for fifties.

Pace attack (Jimmy, Broad, Onions, Flintoff) – Jimmy and Broad may be a couple of clicks down on pace compared to MJ and Lee, but both are quicker than they have been in the past. Jimmy will (probably) swing it too, while Broad will look to bounce the Aussies with the hard ball. Onions will get in close to the stumps and look to bowl fullish moving the ball just enough to slide it from the middle to the edge of the bat. Flintoff will charge in until he is injured – whether at Cardiff or later.

Spinners (Swanny and Monty) – Swanny will bristle with aggression and bubble with imagination, a spinning Siddle, who will use his personality to take wickets with straight deliveries as well as with his surprisingly hard spun off-breaks. Monty will probably carry the drinks, but will be boosted by being named in the squad in expectation of being needed at The Oval for the fifth Test.

With probably only two genuine greats on show (Ponting and KP), what the series lacks in glamour will be more than compensated in intrigue – The Trumpet expects that intrigue to continue from first ball at Cardiff to last ball at The Oval.

Our photo shows that Ashes fever has spread beyond the confines of cricket with football T-shirt specialists Philosophy Football emblazoning a shirt with this fine quote from CB Fry, “To some people cricket is a circus show upon which they may or may not find it worthwhile to spend sixpence; to others a physical art full of plot, interest and enlivened by difficulties; to others, in some sort, it is a cult and a philosophy.”

As an England XI face Warwickshire in a practice match, an Australian XI faces the preposterously titled “England Lions” in a simultaneous practice match. The following tape of a conversation between the two English captains has fallen into the grateful hands of The Tooting Trumpet.

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“Hello, can I speak to Ian Bell please? Oh that is you Ian – sorry, I thought it was the Bell Boy. Well Flintoff thought it was hilarious, but he laughs at his own jokes and nobody else does. What’s that noise? Okay, so it’s Harmy on the mobile to Flintoff laughing.

We’re having a fine time at Edgbaston. In the heat, I decided to give it up after an hour to stay fit and focussed on Cardiff as did most of the lads actually, except Cookie who was the only one of us who knew that the runs would count against our averages, so he hung around to make a hundred and something. He was shattered when he came in, but by all accounts he played well – I’m not sure myself, as I was in the air-conditioned players’ lounge watching Wimbeldon for most of his knock.

Murray? Straight sets – and he looked bloody good. Sorry Belly, it was Colly you were asking about. Not sure really – 20-odd I suppose. Doesn’t matter really does it?

Anyway, how did your lads get on? I heard that your boys were running right through them. What’s that? Hussey and Mitch? That many? Hot too I suppose? And how did Saj do? Oh. And Adil? Oh.

Okay – better go. Good luck tomorrow – you might need it with Mitch on top of his game.”

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As expected, Michael Vaughan retired from playing cricket today in time to slide into a commentator’s seat for the upcoming Ashes series. You can read elsewhere of his centuries, his Number One rating as a batsman and of his record number of victories as England’s captain, so what The Trumpet offers here is a personal view.

On the upside, Vaughan was often a delight to the cricket connoisseur, whether he was elegantly despatching a cover drive or placing a fielder just where the batsman didn’t want one.  He was a decent bowler on his day, which gave him an understanding of how to get the most from an attack, as bowlers and as men. He was a tough nut too, as hard with himself as he fought back from operation after operation on his wonky knees as he was on players who failed to measure up to his exacting standards. Most of all, he was a perfect foil for Duncan Fletcher as the Zimbabwean steered England from the nadir of 1999’s defeat to New Zealand to the apogee of The Ashes win of 2005.

On the downside, Vaughan was a stubborn man who was not averse to looking after his personal interests. Cricket made him wealthy, but that wealth didn’t stop him accepting a full central contract in Autumn 2008 nor his pursuit of outside money-making activities, whilst relentlessly saying that England’s players need more rest. His relations with the Press were often characterised by mutual mistrust, with the Press, for once, somewhat justified. Perhaps least atttractive in the Trumpet’s eyes was Fletcher and Vaughan’s championing of the England “Bubble”, an elite, closed group of favourites that built the attitude and confidence that delivered the Ashes, but excluded many whose faces didn’t fit The Bubble played a key role in England’s swift decline in the late Fletcher and Moores eras.

So no cold May mornings at Derby with Yorkshire 20-2 and a job to be done and no sitting in the Pavilion with Adam Lyth and Jonathan Bairstow passing on accumulated knowledge in private for free.

The Trumpet wishes him well and thanks him for the glory days.

Australia enter their final Ashes warm-up match against the England Second XI tomorrow in less than ideal nick with only their two youngest players, Peter Siddle and Phillip Hughes, in what you would consider Test form.

The batting, although settled because of Watson’s latest injury and the lack of any other batsmen selected, needs runs, and plenty of them, to convince that they are ready to dominate against England’s finest in Cardiff. Sure, they easily produced innings of over 350 against Sussex but no-one scored a century and the middle-order crumbled twice with Brett Lee concealing the failure by making the score respectable with two fighting innings at number eight.

The bowling is still undecided with only Siddle and Johnson worthy of their places for the first Test. Lee will play regardless of his propensity to go for four an over and bowl a no-ball every second one. I suppose if they could carry McDonald in South Africa as a bit part all-rounder then Lee could do the same although he should bat at nine behind the more technically accomplished Johnson.

That leaves one bowling place open with only Clark and Hilfenhaus competing as Hauritz is clearly not up to the mark. Presumably, both quicks will play against The Lions and the better performed should earn the final spot, however, with knowledge of the selector’s conservatism it is likely that Clark will be given the job if he performs admirably at Worcester.

This match against The Lions, Australia’s only First-Class fixture before the First Test, should help all of us ascertain if the BaggyGreens are ready to defend The Ashes. At the moment, I am unsure but it would be wise to wait and see what unfolds over the next week before making a final judgement.

Okay, The Trumpet has some way to go technically and the horror shots at the beginning are worth skipping, but you’ve got to give a man a chance!

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